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Monday, October 25, 2010

Fear and Loathing on the Boobtube


One thing that is getting really old quick are these goddamn campaign ads. Here in my state of California, it is a non-stop back and forth between Meg Whitman and Jerry Brown, but I know that every state is its own battleground. It is quite possible that you could switch the names of all gubernatorial candidates in all of their ads and the messages would be the same.

Anyone who is going to vote is going to look into the issues and pick whichever candidate best represents them. I don't give a fuck if Meg Whitman thinks Jerry Brown is going to spend, spend, spend if its spent on what I care about. And I am not voting for Meg Whitman because Jerry Brown's campaign paid an ungodly sum of money to make her look like Pinnochio (I'm not voting for her because she is going to overturn Assembly Bill 32).

I am all for voting and knowing the issues, but I can't wait for this to be over... the constant invasion of my household with such pointless bullshit. Repeatedly.

JUST LET ME WATCH TELEVISION IN PEACE!



Wednesday, October 6, 2010

It's Not Delivery...

For some reason, calzones strike me as a very manly kind of food. Maybe cause they are so firmly non-diety. Maybe cause they are kind of messy to eat. Maybe cause I equate Italian with masculinity (don't ask me why...I'm not Italian, I don't know).
Anyway, not only are calzones manly, but they are also quite easy to purchase from your local pizza joint and devour in the span of probably 15 minutes. But by now you should have gathered that the whole point of my posting recipes is to deter you from ordering something, or picking something up. I want you to cook it yourself. Why? Because it tastes better, and it's better for you, and you'll feel better about yourself for accomplishing so much.
There. Rant over. Now on to the recipe.
By the way, I'm sorry there is no staggeringly beautiful picture to go with this one. Calzones might be manly, but they sure aren't photogenic.

Broccoli & Sausage Calzones

You’ll Need:

1 container of pre-made pizza dough

2 cups shredded mozzarella

1 package of sweet (or hot, if that’s your thing) Italian sausages

1 medium-sized bunch of broccoli (or veggie of your liking)

1 small container of ricotta cheese

1/2 an onion, finely chopped

1 clove garlic, minced

A few dashes of Italian seasoning, or equal parts garlic powder, oregano, salt, pepper

A very small dash of nutmeg

Parmesan cheese

Marinara sauce, for dipping

To Do:

  • Pre heat oven to 425 degrees
  • Saute onion and garlic in a pan w/a drizzle of EVOO until onions are translucent and garlic is golden brown
  • Remove outer casing (blech) from sausage and add to pan, breaking up the meat into small pieces
  • While sausage is cooking, steam broccoli, then chop into bite-sized pieces
  • When sausage is done, remove from pan w/slotted spoon (to drain fat)
  • Combine broccoli, sausage crumbles, 1/2 the container of ricotta, spices and mozzarella into a bowl, stirring well.
  • Stretch pizza dough onto a non-stick pan. Divide evenly (I divided it into 2 big pieces, but I think next time I’d divide it into 4 smaller sections as I had leftover filling)
  • Pile filling into the center of the dough and cover, making sure to seal the edges
  • Cut 2 or 3 small openings in top of calzone to allow ventage
  • brush tops with oil, Parmesan cheese, and a sprinkle of garlic powder
  • Bake for approx. 20 minutes
  • Heat marinara sauce in the microwave for dipping, and enjoy!